Interview X. Ellie Lopez
speaks on how the 209 influenced her writing career and While in Mourning
Description: Ellie Lopez is a prolific writer from the Central Valley that intends to use her platform to honor her hometown and roots. She is one of the rare few that has achieved great things in her writing career—yet, she recognizes why such triumph has blossomed—home, the 209. In this interview, Ellie Lopez speaks on how the 209 influenced her writing career and While in Mourning, her debut chapbook.
Introduction to Ellie Lopez: HELLO EVERYBODY!! I am Ellie and I am happy to be here and truly honored to be interviewed. What a dream!!
Ellie, it’s amazing to chat with you again! For those of you who do not know—Ellie and I met at the fifth annual Coming Together Poetry Reading and Awards, where I won 3rd place and Ellie won 1st! It was a true honor to stand beside her and hear her narrate her beautiful piece “The 209”, especially as a poet also born and raised in Tracy. With that, Ellie, cheers, and to kick this off, I have to know: what cultivated your passion for writing while living in Tracy?
Well, at first I was motivated by REVENGE haha. Okay seriously, I used to write in my diary about getting out of Tracy and what my dreams would be like. Then later in life writing was my place to gossip because I love to tell fun stories about my life or where I am from because when you meet people who are unfamiliar to the area they’re always like “where?!”. There is a story in every nook and cranny of the 209, and I would write about parties I went to, former friends, lovers, etc. I had a few haters say they hated my writing and would comment how bad my writing was (which to be fair it was bad at the time BUT STILL), so I kept writing out of spite and out of fun of telling a good story haha
Describe your foundation with the 209—how has it developed you as a person and translated to the beginning of your career?
After I graduated high school I was in a weird emotional place of still feeling like a kid and not truly a grown up. I moved to LA thinking that’s where I needed to be, then moved to Fresno then back home. I hate to say that I missed home but there truly isn’t a place like leaving and then coming back home. I am very fortunate because I have a home and family to come back to after trying different versions of myself in the real world. The 209 isn’t perfect, it has its flaws and corruptions but there is something about it. It’s mysterious, it’s secretive, it’s flawed, and that's what makes it human. It took me a long time to realize that coming home isn’t failing even if I thought it at the time. Sometimes coming home is where you need to go to find yourself.
What was your 1st triumph that motivated you to continue writing?
I honestly think it was the 6th grade. We had to write a descriptive paragraph about a photograph. We were all given the same photograph of hills in a valley that you could tell was summer time like the color the Altamont Pass hills are during the summer, all golden and dry. I think I wrote something like “a breeze blows the golden hills like waves on dry land” something cheesy like that. My English teacher read her 3 favorites and mine was one of the 3 favs. That’s when I was like, “wow, maybe I am a writer?”.
Talk about your perspective on Tracy’s literary scene. What do you have to say about the elevation? What do you look forward to?
THE TRACY LITERARY SCENE IS WHERE IT'S AT!! The most supportive individuals and talented wordsmiths. I love going to open mics in town and seeing familiar faces. Seeing Russell, Sess, Auntie Rosie, Cindy, Tiffani, etc. in the crowd I feel less anxious. The most welcoming community which feels rare these days.
What is your intention as a representation of the Valley? What do you want people to know and resonate with about us?
I always like to show in my writing and on me that the valley has personality. There’s a million stories left to be told. Especially in my generation, we lived the small town vibes with big city life. We are more than just farm life and racism and murder! People from the Valley have the best sense of humor and there are many of us that have the same story about similar experiences.
Who is one fellow Valley writer that has influenced you to continue pursuing this career field?
Angelica Flores. Angelica is from Stockton, an amazing poet/activist/storyteller, we connected during the pandemic where she asked fellow writers to start a Sunday Meet-up. It was through her stories, experiences, and faith that gave me the extra push to really work hard on my poems. It’s crazy because everyone in that workshop has accomplished a dream since that workshop. And all thanks to Angelica.
What is one piece of advice that you would like to offer fellow Valley folks who yearn to write?
Write. Write funny things that happened to you, write your family stories, write mean things you want to say to someone, write lists of your dreams, write. Find a melody in what you write and be honest. AND READ. Read your poet friends’ work, do audiobooks, ANYTHING. Sometimes you just need to get lost in other peoples’ stories to work out your stories.
Tell me about the process of conceiving While in Mourning? How did you incorporate your Valley roots in the project? What was your goal behind it?
Lots and lots of crying (mourning) haha. My Abuelita passed in 2018. I was not prepared for her passing. After she passed, I felt very lost (recurring theme with me lol) and really sad. All my family is in Mexico on both sides of my family. It is very hard to be far away in general but after the Matriarch of the family passes it’s harder. I think we forget when our parents immigrated they truly left everything behind but left a longing of comfort when you’re collectively grieving. I felt so alone and sad and wrote. I wrote journal entries, took a million photographs, and after I wrote everything out, I felt like my mourning period was over. Ashely Garcia of Brown Girls Travels mother passed away and they dedicated a special edition of their magazine that I had the honor to write an article titled “While in Mourning” about how I deal with the grieving while trying to still function like an adult. I had more stories to tell that went beyond the allotted 3 pages limit and but wasn’t enough to fill a full book. I met Keana Aguila Labra (Editor of Sampaguitas Press) in 2022, an amazing poet who recently released her full length and brought the idea to see if it would work with their schedules and the rest is history.
Grieving in public is wild. Especially when you have to carry on a full life when you feel like trash, you’re sad, and you feel like no one understands you. I started looking at my environment and the people I surrounded myself with and how much they were all part of the story of the poems. I couldn’t grieve in the motherland with the rest of my family so I grieved at home. The first bathroom stall at my old job has so many of my tears it should hold a plaque saying “ellie lopez cried many times here”.
I honestly wanted it to be published. I didn’t want to self-publish. The selfish part of me wanted to show that they need to know how dope my Abuelita was and why I think she’s so special haha. Any time I would write about my Abuelita, people would resonate and I didn’t feel so lonely knowing that we were grieving as a community. Sometimes we just want people that need to read a story that reminds us about how much we love our loved ones as crazy as they are.
How did you feel holding the 1st copy of While in Mourning? How has it been a testimony to your journey with the 209 and writing?
I am on Lexapro so I don’t cry as much anymore. Haha It felt surreal like it wasn’t real. It’s crazy where life will lead you in 5 years and how much you’ve grown. Also amazing what therapy and mental health advocating and surrounding yourself with dope human beings can do for your art. I am a product of my community. My community helped my writing and find my voice. I ride hard for the 209.
And finally, the question: who is your favorite writer?
I have too many but these are my inspirations; Yesika Salgado, Alan Chazaro, Sofia Aguilar, and Keana Aguila Labra.
Ellie Lopez’s Biography: Ellie Lopez (she/her) is a storyteller & photographer from the 209. Her work has been published by Sin Cesar, Maria’s at Sampaguitas, curio cabinet, hot pot magazine and mixed mag. She recently received 1st place in the City of Tracy’s Annual Poetry Contest. When she’s not ear hustling for chismes or telling stories you can find her on social media @missellielopez. Ellie’s chapbook BuiLit Zine “While in Mourning” was released via Sampaguitas Press in August 2024.